https://climaneed.com/members/jokes/activity/ Activity feed for Jack. Thu, 16 Apr 2026 18:27:08 +0200 https://buddypress.org/?v=2.11.0 en-US 30 hourly 2 bf9b866df78dfbde4745403e1c77ff11 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41819/ Thu, 16 Apr 2026 16:34:04 +0200 A perfectionist walked into a bar… apparently, the bar was not set high enough.

]]> 0 2c22817fb3b280d898a78c19d8d39b25 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41817/ Thu, 16 Apr 2026 12:33:04 +0200 What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.

]]> 0 7eba2270d8e8772e44814eb784950906 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41812/ Thu, 16 Apr 2026 08:31:57 +0200 Why did the database administrator leave his wife?
She had one-to-many relationships.

]]> 0 cbd483ace73d612d92a2b65790d4a06e https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41810/ Thu, 16 Apr 2026 04:31:54 +0200 Has COVID-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
If so, you may be entitled to condensation.

]]> 0 6fb2662c349cbf13610a6cb05e643efe https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41805/ Thu, 16 Apr 2026 00:32:38 +0200 To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my Word!

]]> 0 a292e79b161de1b4e8df6ab759c161cd https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41802/ Wed, 15 Apr 2026 20:32:00 +0200 Eight bytes walk into a bar.
The bartender asks, “Can I get you anything?”
“Yeah,” reply the bytes.
“Make us a double.”

]]> 0 9d38daf7f5dd3bee95fce0bbb2b80347 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41800/ Wed, 15 Apr 2026 16:32:10 +0200 This morning I accidentally made my coffee with Red Bull instead of water.
I was already on the highway when I noticed I forgot my car at home.

]]> 0 a4c8a70650235f3110053b8cda329c11 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41798/ Wed, 15 Apr 2026 12:32:44 +0200 “99.9% of the people are dumb!”
“Fortunately I belong to the remaining 1%”

]]> 0 6bf7f621f02caae575e915b0effbf873 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41793/ Wed, 15 Apr 2026 08:32:39 +0200 I hate Russian matryoshka dolls.
They’re so full of themselves.

]]> 0 770de9382889972b1af3fe07cea3c3ad https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41790/ Wed, 15 Apr 2026 04:31:58 +0200 Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog’s paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote.

]]> 0 4edb042ad981fa6665da0f906ccec4e9 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41788/ Wed, 15 Apr 2026 00:32:11 +0200 Why do ghosts go on diets?
So they can keep their ghoulish figures.

]]> 0 6520183f51c25ce19c69d613a38710ef https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41785/ Tue, 14 Apr 2026 20:32:15 +0200 I asked my wife if I was the only one she’s been with.
She said, “Yes, the others were at least sevens or eights.”

]]> 0 f77b123ab6f60eecdbbed1dc3fdb4cde https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41783/ Tue, 14 Apr 2026 16:33:56 +0200 What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It’s a pain in the neck.

]]> 0 bf38b5510126462af0d9adf0e80fdae6 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41781/ Tue, 14 Apr 2026 12:32:28 +0200 Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.

]]> 0 d63b715f6c8ed9aa0aa71a2468ff9a22 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41776/ Tue, 14 Apr 2026 08:33:54 +0200 Where do sick cruise ships go to get healthy?
The dock!

]]> 0 aadeaef1662abc2c47bb0d9e4b911bd0 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41774/ Tue, 14 Apr 2026 04:32:35 +0200 Why did the JavaScript heap close shop?
It ran out of memory.

]]> 0 5326cc973a4c3b85401613181009aca3 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41772/ Tue, 14 Apr 2026 00:31:45 +0200 No matter how kind you are…
German kids are always Kinder.

]]> 0 6a47d19d10588e472b72883255d839ca https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41769/ Mon, 13 Apr 2026 20:31:59 +0200 What is the best prefix for global variables?
//

]]> 0 c6c0e11ad931668182370f6fd1004b05 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41767/ Mon, 13 Apr 2026 16:32:52 +0200 Which part of the hospital has the least privacy?
The ICU.

]]> 0 c2bfbffc76c4bc114de50006290690fe https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41765/ Mon, 13 Apr 2026 12:33:29 +0200 This morning I accidentally made my coffee with Red Bull instead of water.
I was already on the highway when I noticed I forgot my car at home.

]]> 0 947682d901033a125e44343108116572 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41762/ Mon, 13 Apr 2026 08:32:15 +0200 I have a joke about Stack Overflow, but you would say it’s a duplicate.

]]> 0 283b71b4a7db43cfb538d701561775a5 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41760/ Mon, 13 Apr 2026 04:31:52 +0200 I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went.
Then it dawned on me.

]]> 0 26db828012c61fa30124ca04c8f12a5c https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41758/ Mon, 13 Apr 2026 00:33:51 +0200 How do construction workers party?
They raise the roof.

]]> 0 15f9c180a42f094051903f39aa27a281 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41755/ Sun, 12 Apr 2026 20:33:01 +0200 What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.

]]> 0 0957baba3114db05d75bea80e456ec4f https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41753/ Sun, 12 Apr 2026 16:32:04 +0200 What says Oh Oh Oh?
Santa walking backwards!

]]> 0 8f781956231766084c85549757de73b2 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41751/ Sun, 12 Apr 2026 12:31:51 +0200 Why does no one like SQLrillex?
He keeps dropping the database.

]]> 0 e4b2793a4584440a76399963d65f5387 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41746/ Sun, 12 Apr 2026 08:34:12 +0200 “99.9% of the people are dumb!”
“Fortunately I belong to the remaining 1%”

]]> 0 5e9dbce0b9f23606482f525c6061ea7d https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41744/ Sun, 12 Apr 2026 04:34:15 +0200 What is in a ghost’s nose?
Boo-gers.

]]> 0 5b50366beb7dee38e4c7e1ab429a0857 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41742/ Sun, 12 Apr 2026 00:32:05 +0200 Why did the koala get rejected?
Because he did not have any koalafication.

]]> 0 946c7a47da13ed03ee33744e556b30a3 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41739/ Sat, 11 Apr 2026 20:31:51 +0200 What’s the difference between an in-law and an outlaw?
An outlaw is wanted.

]]> 0 c05b9a65b7469f65370872a321f176bc https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41737/ Sat, 11 Apr 2026 16:32:13 +0200 What does the mermaid wear to math class?
Algae-bra.

]]> 0 f05b3d34bb0d846d242c1a6698ec2061 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41735/ Sat, 11 Apr 2026 12:32:57 +0200 Mom asked me where I’m taking her to go out to eat for mother’s day.
I told her, “We already have food in the house”.

]]> 0 418eb98591be6cc1d5114f71868f3bb6 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41730/ Sat, 11 Apr 2026 08:31:53 +0200 There are only 10 kinds of people in this world: those who know binary and those who don’t.

]]> 0 c1e9aa8a20e51f0ee6b1b787bfc12c8e https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41728/ Sat, 11 Apr 2026 04:35:03 +0200 Why do Java programmers hate communism?
They don’t want to live in a classless society.

]]> 0 71a8bd2f18cc9cb120a1f090494819ba https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41726/ Sat, 11 Apr 2026 00:35:56 +0200 Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Recursion.
Recursion who?
Knock knock.

]]> 0 d67c5206d3696511059038346507947a https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41723/ Fri, 10 Apr 2026 20:31:54 +0200 I walked into a bar once.
It really hurt my head.

]]> 0 47a18b643902dbfb851f11c1391c1788 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41719/ Fri, 10 Apr 2026 16:32:43 +0200 What is the most used language in programming?
Profanity.

]]> 0 7e26a9b27eca2a2564522dec375bf7b7 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41717/ Fri, 10 Apr 2026 12:32:03 +0200 Why did the Python programmer not respond to the foreign mails he got?
Because his interpreter was busy collecting garbage.

]]> 0 9afaa91f928bccde2e4f3b6e41022276 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41712/ Fri, 10 Apr 2026 08:31:58 +0200 Why does the size of the snack not matter to a giraffe?
Because even a little bit goes a long way.

]]> 0 061f7955e574895b3e12fcaf9b1eba8b https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41710/ Fri, 10 Apr 2026 04:32:41 +0200 Why did the programmer jump on the table?
Because debug was on his screen.

]]> 0 a221f403db70f9fb561a607a59485a6d https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41708/ Fri, 10 Apr 2026 00:32:08 +0200 To prove he was right, the flat-earther walked to the end of the Earth.
He eventually came around.

]]> 0 6a0f58c394b55fe75561926f59f8acb1 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41705/ Thu, 09 Apr 2026 20:33:15 +0200 I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

]]> 0 07abff7ae74f6ae14fb8776f149e46bc https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41703/ Thu, 09 Apr 2026 16:33:59 +0200 How do you generate a random string?
Put a Windows user in front of Vim and tell them to exit.

]]> 0 43e2c0eaafd2b38b28ddc2eca3be98a5 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41701/ Thu, 09 Apr 2026 12:31:59 +0200 What do you call a pile of kittens?
A meowntain.

]]> 0 483ada9c05ab9fe62fcbbc4219da1554 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41696/ Thu, 09 Apr 2026 08:32:03 +0200 What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.

]]> 0 bb27bd295de3a12ca589b022d2d53775 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41694/ Thu, 09 Apr 2026 04:32:42 +0200 My employer came running to me and said, “I was looking for you all day! Where the hell have you been?”
I replied, “Good employees are hard to find.”

]]> 0 961f71e5e6d4f687a84a47f2ba098159 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41692/ Thu, 09 Apr 2026 00:33:57 +0200 What’s the difference between England and a tea bag?
The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

]]> 0 d20daa5713765b993c08d06304a2df1b https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41689/ Wed, 08 Apr 2026 20:33:47 +0200 What is the most used language in programming?
Profanity.

]]> 0 ea9877858291307887343feb2dcabf10 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41687/ Wed, 08 Apr 2026 16:35:31 +0200 What do you call a pile of kittens?
A meowntain.

]]> 0 2751a3717e946d0e9d077186f39916c8 https://climaneed.com/discover/p/41685/ Wed, 08 Apr 2026 12:31:49 +0200 What does the mermaid wear to math class?
Algae-bra.

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